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Earth Geeks Must Go! is the twenty-fourth book in the Goosebumps Series 2000 book series. It was published in 1999.

The cover artwork shows a spaceship heading to Earth.

Plot

Jacob Miller is a completely average child. He is anything but heroic. As he goes to his new school, middle school, to begin sixth grade, he sees something is different. He does not recognize any of his friends, but assumes that they are just in other classes. Jacob soon finds that the teacher refers to the grade he is in as the "trelth" grade, and Jacob is confused. The teacher begins writing some kind of a foreign language on the board, and Jacob cannot figure out what it is. Everyone else begins doing it correctly, and Jacob bluffs his way through the class. Next period, computer class, Jacob finds that the foreign language is on the keyboards, and Jacob sees his classmates typing with their tongues! Next period, lunch, the children eat with their armpits, and Jacob is horrified to find that only ONE other person in the entire cafeteria is eating like a human.

Jacob flees the school with his sister Arlene, who is the other human, when the entire student body recognizes that they are humans. The atmosphere is hot, with a reddish haze in the sky. There are a few trees, and they seek refuge in an empty house. While watching television, they find people catching two-headed fish, and a news anchor who tells the viewers that "Earth Geeks" have landed, that they could be dangerous. The viewers are advised to arm themselves and kill any they find. Jacob suddenly realizes that they are the "Earth Geeks", who had accidentally been brought to the planet. Jacob does not know why they are there, or if it is an accident. They find that they need to escape the planet, but that proves to be difficult, as they discover that they have to fight against the population of that planet: creepy and ravenous creatures called Splatters who are attempting to kill all of the "Earth Geeks". Jacob finds his father, when he discovers that a time bomb has been planted in his father's wristwatch. One Splatter named Grolff tells them to give it to him. His dad gave it but Jacob breaks it and Grolff dies. They were called the heroes, then they come back to Earth. However, it is revealed that they never landed on Earth at all, and instead landed on another planet with purple lizard-like aliens that look like humans.

International releases

Gallery

Artwork

Trivia

Earth Geeks Must Die!

Original cover with the title of Earth Geeks Must Die!

  • The title of the book was originally supposed to be Earth Geeks Must Die!. The title was likely deemed too violent and thus changed by Scholastic. This is notably odd because books such as Say Cheese and Die! use the word "die" in the title.
  • Jacob and Arlene's father was mentioned by name in the book: Eric Miller.
  • Outside of Give Yourself Goosebumps, this is the first and only Goosebumps book to use the present tense.
  • The 'fake Earth' with purple, lizard-like creatures is a possible reference to The Creeps.
  • The Splatters are similar to the Space Hunter Nebula M Cockroach Aliens from the 1972 Toho film "Godzilla Vs. Gigan", because they both disguise themselves as humans, and both of them are insect like aliens from a planet similar to Earth.

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